Minerva's Fight with the Sorting Hat
by Healer Pomfrey
Summary: Another story about the Sorting Hat, and this time it's Minerva McGonagall who has her problems with the 'filthy old piece of cloth.' Just a little drabble that came into my mind. Completely AU


**Minerva's ****Fight with the Sorting Hat**

Eleven-year old Minerva McGonagall stood in the Great Hall next to Poppy Pomfrey, and both girls were excitedly observing Rolanda Hooch's Sorting. The three girls had met on the Hogwarts Express and had already become good friends. "Let's try to get into the same House," Minerva whispered to Poppy, who nodded eagerly.

"Okay, Minnie; perhaps it's possible to talk to the Hat," Poppy, who was much quieter than her friend, replied calmly.

"Gryffindor," the Hat called out, and Rolanda made her way to the lions' table, throwing Minerva and Poppy an uncertain look.

The Sorting seemed to drag on endlessly, before Minerva was finally called. She briskly walked up to the chair and sat down, impatiently waiting for Dumbledore to lower the Hat onto her head.

'_Oh, this is not difficult_,' she soon heard a small voice in her head, '_you'll do well in Ravenclaw_.'

'_No_,' Minerva thought back to the Hat, '_please put me into Gryffindor together with Rolanda and Poppy_.'

'_How do you think I'm making my decisions?_' the Hat asked in an upset voice. '_It depends on your character and traits and not on your friendships where I place you_.'

'_Please_,' Minerva begged.

'_No_,' the Hat replied, causing Minerva to throw a temper tantrum.

'_Well, then why am I talking to you at all, you filthy piece of cloth? Wait till I'll be able to do difficult Transfiguration spells, and I'm going to transfigure you into something you won't like at all!_'

'_Oh, you're threatening me? Well, maybe Gryffindor is indeed the right place. But I'm going to get my revenge_.' With that, the Hat shouted into the hall, "Gryffindor."

Before Minerva could sigh in relief at the Hat's final announcement, a sharp pain penetrated her head, and she heard the Hat laugh evilly, before Dumbledore finally took it off her head. She slowly walked over to the Gryffindor table, holding her head in agony.

"What's wrong, Minnie?" Rolanda queried, eyeing her new friend in obvious concern, while Poppy walked up to Dumbledore to get sorted as well.

'_What did you do to my friend?_' Poppy asked as soon as the Hat covered most part of her head.

'_Oh no! As much as I'd love to put you into Hufflepuff, where you'd originally belong, you seem to be another of these cunning Gryffindors, who are looking for a fight on their first evening here. Dunderheads_.' With that, the Hat became quiet and finally announced, "Gryffindor."

HP HEALER POMFREY HP

"Minnie, what happened?" Poppy asked a short while later, realising in concern that her friend was still gripping her head and didn't eat anything. "Are you in pain?"

"The Hat," Minerva replied in a small voice, "must have cast some spell at me. I have a terrible headache."

The Welcoming Feast seemed to last for an infinite amount of time, and the three friends were glad when they were finally led to the Gryffindor common room and shown to their dormitories.

"Minnie, lie down on your bed and let me check on you," Poppy instructed her friend, noticing that Minerva's face was white with feverishly flushed cheeks, beads of sweat were forming on her forehead, and her expression was pain stricken.

Knowing that Poppy was able to do several diagnostic spells, which she had learned from her grandmother, who was the resident Mediwitch at Hogwarts, Minerva complied, causing Poppy to wave her wand over her and finally sigh.

"I'm sorry, Minnie, but it's not only that you have a bad headache; you're also running a fever, and I'm not sure why. Probably, it was the Hat casting something at you, like you said, but I'd prefer taking you to Granny. You'll need a pain relieving potion and a fever reducer in any case."

Minerva grudgingly followed her friend to the hospital wing, where Poppy's grandmother checked on her, muttering to herself in annoyance, and fed her several potions, before she finally kept her for twenty-four hours, causing Minerva to miss her very first day of classes.

HP

_**Ten years later**__**...**_

Minerva, Poppy and Rolanda had breakfast together with Headmaster Dumbledore in his office. It was the first of September, and for the three witches it was the first day of their employment at Hogwarts.

Suddenly, Poppy glanced at the Sorting Hat and chuckled. "Minnie, do you remember what the Hat did to you at our Sorting?"

Minerva threw her a menacing glare. "Of course I remember that. Because of that idiot I missed our first day of classes."

"Well, as Deputy Headmistress it's probably your job to fetch the Hat for the Sorting, isn't it, Albus?" Rolanda laughed.

'_Oh no, I'm not going to let that happen_,' Minerva mused as she stood up from her seat, her breakfast forgotten. "I believe it's time to fulfil my part of our deal, to get rid of you, you filthy piece of cloth." With that, she waved her wand at the Hat and transfigured it into a bowl with phoenix treats. "I hope it'll at least taste well," she said to Fawkes, placing the bowl on the bird's perch.

The phoenix let out a beautiful trill of joy, which sounded like, "The pleasure of finally being rid of the annoying busybody will be sufficient to overlook the taste."

**The End**

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I'm not a native speaker of English. Please excuse my mistakes or help me to correct them._

_All recognizable characters belong to J. K. Rowling, and I am not earning anything by writing this story._


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